Monthly Archives: January 2018

Monday Morning Coffee

January 15, 2018

NBA executives have lost their minds.  Lavar Ball ran his mouth saying nobody wants to play for Luke Walton.  Just because the Lakers didn’t make some statement supporting Walton, they think he’s going to get fired.  The Lakers don’t make statements supporting their coaches when I rip them on Jock Talk LA, or when some guy at the barber shop talks badly about them.  Lavar Ball is entertaining, but his opinions carry no more weight than mine or barber shop guy, so no need for the statement.  In fact, they are handling it well by not even addressing it.  By the way, the Lakers have won 4 in a row and are finally beating crummy teams they were losing to before.

Meanwhile, there’s actually quite shocking news related to the Clippers.  They recently talked to Minnesota about a Blake Griffin for Karl-Anthony Towns trade.  Forget the fact the Timberwolves would never do that deal.  The story is that the Clipps are actually ready to move on from Blake.  This guy has been the face of the franchise for the last 7 years, but it’s clear they are not looking to rebuild around him, but rather just blow it up.  A Blake trade will probably come later, but the DeAndre Jordan trade looks like it could be coming before February’s trade deadline.

To the NFL where it was a wild divisional round weekend.  Marcus Williams was trying to tackle Manti Te’o’s girlfriend on that last play in the Saints-Vikings game.  That was a great game with an unbelievable finish.  Sean Payton will probably get up this morning and throw a challenge flag disputing the fact the sun actually rose.  Steeler fans better put some chloroform on those terrible towels to knock themselves out.  So much for that Patriots re-match they were talking about all week.     The Falcons loss capped a rough week for football fans in the state of Georgia.  Marcus Mariotta needed to throw a lot more touchdown passes to himself if he was going to beat the Patriots.  Can’t wait for the Nick Foles vs Case Keenum battle next week in the “Jeff Fisher Can’t Hurt Us Anymore Bowl”.

The Chargers will apparently be playing in London next season.  Great! Maybe the NFL will consider leaving them there after the game! The Chargers may have had an improved ending to their season, but their ownership is clueless, and so are the other NFL owners that thought it was a good idea to put two teams in LA.  I give it five years before they pack up and move back down the freeway,

I don’t know what was more disappointing this weekend.  Reading about Dan Guerrero’s interview with the LA Times, or seeing UCLA basketball lose at home to Colorado.  Guerrero found a way to say a whole lot without actually saying anything.  He also claimed that the expectations at UCLA are to win national championships.  If that’s the case, I’m not sure why the follow up question to that wasn’t “well then why is Steve Alford still coaching the basketball team then?”  Then Alford’s team takes the floor and looks completely unprepared to play against Colorado.  No defense, no offensive flow, and it doesn’t look like the players are even developing.  UCLA is hardly even a lock to make the tournament right now.  Remember when everyone said the Bruins were going to be even better this year? Apparently not.

Yu Darvish reminds me of a woman who thinks she’s super hot and over exaggerates the level of interest a handful of guys have in her.  Darvish tweeted five teams are interested in him: the Yankees, the Astros, the Rangers, the Twins, and the Cubs.  Except the Yankees pulled their offer for him after 48 hours, the Astros made a trade for Gerrit Cole, the Cubs can bring back Jake Arrieta for less, and the Rangers don’t seem to want to spend.  Meanwhile the Twins are ready to show him the money, but it’s clear he has no interest in going there.  I won’t be surprised if he takes a 1-year deal somewhere with a “mystery team”.  Hopefully that mystery team isn’t the Dodgers.

Finally, we’re headed for episode 3 of The Bachelor on ABC tonight.  However, episode 2 was bizarre.  It felt like we were watching episode 8 of the season given that Arie basically had a hometown date.  Best line on the show: “I’m not sad about leaving you I’m sad about leaving all my new friends.”  Krystal’s smile and laugh are already giving me a headache.  Why doesn’t anybody ever eat their food on these dates?  Bibiana is tailor made for Bachelor in Paradise.  I get that she’s playing the role of the “hot tempered Latina”, but ABC doesn’t need to top if off with the Mariachi music they play when she’s on screen.  Becca clearly went on the best date in the show’s history because she got to keep all that designer gear.  If she was smart thought she’d sell it  for a nice chunk of change.  Annalise’s bumper car trauma is the whitest thing I’ve ever heard.  “Bumper Car Trauma” is going to be my new excuse for everything.  Here’s a reenactment of her trauma.

 

 

 

 

Monday Morning Coffee

January 8, 2018

The fans finally showed up to the Coliseum on Saturday.  Unfortunately, the Rams didn’t, as they got upset by the Falcons in the opening round of the playoffs.  At least the fans got to see Snoop Dog perform.  Snoop must have smoked out with some of the players before the game, because the Rams’ offense looked pretty stoned.  Sean McVay, Jared Goff, and Todd Gurley had no playoff experience, and they all played and coached like it.  The Falcons looked like that old guy at the YMCA you think you can destroy with your youth, yet you get dismantled by his savvy smooth moves.  This is why you shouldn’t rest your starters in the last game of the season  I’ve gotta give the team credit for a great year, but you can’t deny the disappointment.  They had a chance to capture the fans, but now nobody will show up until they get to the playoffs again.  I’d say the future is bright, but you never really know in the NFL from year-to-year, so they might have blown an opportunity even bigger than you think.

Elsewhere around Wild Card Weekend, the Saints won but they were lucky.  Sean Payton got away with some stupid play-calling, like a sugared up 16-year old playing Madden 18.  For a second I thought Doc Rivers was coaching the Saints.  That Bills vs Jags game set NFL Football back about 20 years.  That game film should be used to torture POW’s.  The Chiefs blew a 21-3 lead and lost to the Titans.  This explains a lot though…….

To the NBA, where Lavar Ball has done it again running his mouth.  Looks like that talk Magic and Pelinka had with Lavar really set him straight a couple of weeks ago.  Nice job guys.  Now Lavar is claiming that Luke Walton should be fired, the players have tuned him out, and of course that Lonzo isn’t being coached properly.  There’s no question that some of Walton’s decision making can be questioned, but the fact Lavar is being given a platform for this is insane, and the Lakers are only enabling him to do so.  Walton shouldn’t be fired, but its clear that at the moment the team isn’t responding to whatever he is preaching.  If the Laker front office wasn’t screaming from the mountain top that they plan on getting rid of everybody and signing free agents, Walton’s job would be a lot easier.  That parts not his fault.  By the way, the Lavar Ball 30 for 30 is going to be amazing.

Blake Griffin just can’t catch a break.  He’s injured again after taking an elbow to his grill in Saturday’s loss to the Warriors.  If the league really cared about Blake’s well being, they would keep him in the concussion protocol until he stopped dating Kendall Jenner.  As if the guy doesn’t have enough problems dealing with the Clipper Curse, so now he has to deal with a Kardashian one too?  Sources say the Clippers would consider parting with DeAndre Jordan if the Cavs would throw in the Nets draft pick in a deal.  We’re reaching the point where the Clippers should part ways with Blake Griffin before he becomes labeled as “damaged goods”.

Some of the things that Andrew Friedman does make absolutely no sense.  Friedman seems committed to acquiring cheap relievers to fortify the Dodger bullpen every year, and not overpay for relievers that may have overachieved in one particular year.  That’s fine, but why is Pedro Baez still on this team after four years of playoff failures? Why is Friedman so obsessed with this guy? He was so bad last year that he wasn’t even usable in the postseason.  Sounds like his super computer has a virus.

The longer a pitcher like Yu Darvish remains unsigned, the more likely it is he goes for a much lower price than he is asking for.  That means a team like the Angels could still swoop in and sign him.  The Halos could easily sign Darvish to a contract paying him $20 million per year, while remaining below the luxury tax threshold.  The Halos need to spend money now, because everybody will have money next season.  They also need more pitching, and Darvish doesn’t have to be a #1 for them, but just a solid piece of the rotation.  He’ll also fit in perfectly with the other Angel pitchers because he’s had Tommy John’s surgery.

How does UCLA basketball manage to go into Kentucky and take care of the #7 team in the country, yet blows it against lowly Stanford? Oh that’s right, it’s because they are coached by Steve Alford.  Alford is probably teaching his team the fundamentals of defense by showing them YouTube video of James Harden.  The worst part is for as great of an offensive coach as Alford is supposed to be, the team isn’t even exciting to watch! Gone is the buzz of Bruin basketball.

Finally, what the hell was ABC thinking? They air the season premier of The Bachelor on New Years Day, competing with the College Football Playoff.  The show’s ratings suffered, and you can be sure they will suffer tonight when the show competes with the National Championship.  I guess you can eliminate anybody in the south from watching the show.  ABC is also bringing in Arie Luyendyk as the Bachelor, five seasons removed from being on the show.  I actually like this move because he’s past the reality show life and car racing, which makes him an even better character.  The first women that said “I grew up around cars” to impress him had to have meant that she grew up in a house where her mom and dad owned two cars.  Tia, who is from Weiner, Arkansas, is a clone of Raven from the last couple of seasons.  It’s like the show has to fill a quota of Arkansas contestants.  Those girls that got sent home after the 1st show and didn’t even get time with Arie deserve to get sent home, and I don’t care if they are crying a river.  It’s a competition ladies, so compete!

 

Monday Morning Coffee

January 1, 2018

Could the Lakers be any more disappointing?  They are clearly a lottery team once again, and this time they don’t have a lottery pick.  They may have stabilized their front office, but on the court they are still as shaky as Donald Trump’s approval rating.  They never show up to play against teams they should beat, they play too much isolation ball, and Julius Randle doesn’t play nearly enough minutes.  If they’ve given up on trading Luol Deng as reports suggest, why don’t they just waive him or play him instead of leaving him in limbo? I also don’t understand why Luke Walton won’t play Ivica Zubac, rather than Andrew Bogut and Brook Lopez, who won’t be with the team next year.  This is a total disaster, and it’s a locker room that’s going to get further splintered in the coming weeks.  The only way to turn this thing around is to get free agents to come here, but why would they? This feels like the same movie that starred Mitch Kupchak and Jim Buss, only with a new cast of characters.

Meanwhile, the Clippers got Blake Griffin back in the lineup on Friday, and Doc Rivers probably thinks they can win an NBA Championship.  This is really the worst thing to happen to the Clippers since they decided to change their uniforms into those ugly pajamas.  The Clips are just delaying the inevitable rebuild.  They need to trade DeAndre, Blake, and the disaster that is Danilo Gallnari.  They’ll be locked in NBA purgatory until they do.

To College Football where the Trojans got blown off the field against Ohio State in the Cotton Bowl.  USC looked so bad, Sam Darnold might have been playing bad purposely so the Browns don’t draft him.  It was typical Sam.  Make a handful of highlight throws that the scouts will drool over, then serve up a handful of turnovers like Betty Crocker.  However, the real problem the Trojan faithful can point to is Clay Helton.  Once again, against a nationally elite opponent, USC looked like they had no business being on the field, and completely unprepared.  The Trojans got beat badly on the line of scrimmage, and the play calling was completely unimaginative.  Darnold would be foolish to come back to school with Helton there, but if USC is serious about having a legitimate national powerhouse, they will find themselves an elite coach.

The Bruins didn’t fare much better in their bowl game against Kansas State, but it was hard to expect them to since Josh Rosen was sidelined with an injury.  The real story here is Rosen suggesting that he would return to school just so he won’t get drafted by the Browns.  Let’s be honest Josh, we all know you aren’t stupid enough to turn down $20 million in guaranteed money just to avoid Cleveland.  If he’s dumb enough to do that, then it’s clear he didn’t get any education at UCLA.  The Bruins and every other team in the Pac-12 didn’t exactly make the conference look good this bowl season…..

Sean McVay and the Rams almost pulled it off.  By losing yesterday, they nearly took the #4 seed, setting themselves up for a showdown with a wounded Philadelphia team.  Instead, they’ll have to go through Atlanta, and then Minnesota if they advance.  The road is going to be tough, but I really like the Rams chances to make it out of the NFC.  Their offense is as good as anyones, and their defense has the ability come up with big plays.  As long as McVay doesn’t take the boys to Catch LA the night before and overload on sushi and saki, I fully expect the Rams to take care of business against the Falcons next week.  I also fully expect the Coliseum to actually have fans in it for at least one week.

As for the Chargers, maybe next year they will remember that the season starts in September, rather than October.  The Bolts 0-4 start killed them, and despite yesterday’s big win against the Raiders, they didn’t get the help they needed from other teams to sneak into the postseason.  Sure we’re going to hear for the next 6 months how the Bolts are building momentum for next year.  However, the Raiders are talented and about to bring back Jon Gruden.  The Chiefs are oozing with talent and aren’t going anywhere.  The Chargers still can’t be trusted to win close games, and I’m not so sure that changes in the Philip Rivers’ era.  I’m also not so sure they last five years in LA with the lack of support they are getting.

Wow, that Ravens season disappeared quicker than Ray Lewis’ bloody white glove.  Watching Joe Flacco play football is like some form or cruel and unusual punishment.  Andy Dalton really is an expert at taking teams out of the playoffs: his own and other teams.  I guess that was the closest Marvin Lewis will come to winning a playoff game.  It was so cold in New England yesterday, the football were naturally deflated.  I’d like to congratulate the Browns on fulfilling my hopes and dreams and finishing the season a perfect 0-16.  Cheer up Cleveland, you still have another beating to look forward to from the Warriors in the NBA Finals.