June 3, 2019
Imagine playing a drinking game where you had to take a shot for every time the Lakers organization humiliated themselves over the last 6 months. You would definitely be dead by now. I wouldn’t blame Lebron James if he felt like playing that game at this point. The man has been recruiting like crazy, but there’s no chance the Lakers will end up with KD, Kawhi, Klay, or even Kyrie or Jimmy Butler. At this point Rob Lowe has a better chance of getting his phone call returned by another NBA GM than Rob Pelinka. Plus unlike Pelinka, Lowe wouldn’t need to be “fact-checked” more than Donald Trump. Maybe when this summers train wreck is finally over, the franchise will come to their senses and make some real change for the better. Or Maybe that’s just wishful thinking as well.
The NBA’s tampering rules are ridiculous. Don’t get me wrong, it would have been totally hypocritical for the league to not fine Doc Rivers for his comments about Kawhi Leonard on ESPN earlier this week after Magic Johnson got fined for saying things even less eye opening about players under contract. However, what’s the real harm behind talking about players under contract? Everybody and their mother already knows the Clippers are recruiting Kawhi Leonard. Why do Doc Rivers comments have any bearing on this? It’s silly, and just another rule to protect these cry baby small market owners. As for Doc’s comments themselves, only he would say something as ridiculous as comparing Leonard to Michael Jordan. He sounds like another idiot fan boy on Twitter that’s been watching the NBA for five minutes but why would you expect any less? I guess that’s what recruiting means these days.
The Raptors blew a massive opportunity yesterday against the Warriors and are doomed after losing home court advantage. If you can’t beat the Warriors without KD, without Klay, and with Steph suffering from the flu, it’s not going to happen. I’m pretty sure Marc Gasol and Pascal Siakam aren’t going to combine for 52 points in a game again in this series. If the Lakers earned as many free throws as were shot last night they would have lost by 20. If it wasn’t for State Farm, the Rockets would never be seen in the Finals. Ramona Shelburne is probably going to think she’s god’s gift to sports journalism after President Obama told her she does a great job last night. I’m surprised Drake wasn’t rubbing Obama’s shoulders before the night was over. If the Raptors win more games, Donald Trump will probably impose additional tariff tax on Canada.
To baseball, where I’ve gotta give Andrew Friedman credit for this. He knows his free agent signings are garbage, which might explain why he operates like a cheapskate every winter. This season is another perfect example with Joe Kelly and AJ Pollock getting paid over $20 million combined this year, yet they’ve both done about as much as you and I have to contribute to the Dodgers’ success. They should replace Joe Kelly Bobblehead night with Joe Kelly Voodoo Doll night. It’s great that the Dodgers are at the top of the MLB standings, but this team as always, will be judged by how they fare come October. They’ll need to fix their bullpen if they plan on succeeding then. Isn’t that what Friedman is supposed to be good at? We’re still waiting for him to figure it out 5 years later.
The Angels wish they could play the Mariners every weekend, after treating them like a pinata for the last three days. I haven’t seen Albert Pujols look that good since he was in St. Louis. Still, the sad part about the Angels is that not only are they not winning much in general, but they aren’t even creating buzz in town. I mean if they aren’t going to win, at least have somebody go to Mastros or Javier’s in Newport and start a bar fight over some gold digger. People will show up if you win. But the only thing that’s worse than losing is being boring. The Halos are both right now, and not even Mike Trout can solve that problem by himself.
The silliest thing I’ve heard in the last week was from NFL Insider Mike Florio, who suggested that Jared Goff might not get a 2nd contract from the Rams. Really? Goff is still on his rookie deal and helped the Rams get to the Super Bowl last year. Are we talking about the same guy? You people do realize that it is possible that Goff can and will improve as a quarterback right? As long as the Rams continue to protect him with a good o-line, there’s no reason Goff can’t continue to grow as a Quarterback and make big throws, which he’s already shown he can do. Goff is actually the least of concerns for the Rams, and instead it’s Todd Gurley and his knee. His knee makes me more nervous than Antonio Cromartie would be on Mothers Day.
Finally, another episode of The Bachelorette went down last week on ABC and it’s back again tonight. I’m thinking John Paul Jones has never watched The Bachelorette before, has no idea what’s going on and is just here for the free food and drinks. Just a hunch but I’m thinking Cam’s previous relationships weren’t ruined by amputation, giving a dog away, or his grandma being sick. More likely that he’s a stage 5 clinger, creepy, maybe even a serial killer. I feel like ABC needs to throw me a pity rose and pay for my cable for the next month to make up for how awful this season has been so far. As if this season hasn’t been bad enough, now I have to endure watching a couple of Boston Celtics on the show as well, and seeing Hannah wear a Celtics jersey. I always knew this girl was no good .