Monday Morning Coffee

March 2, 2020

Last Monday morning was an incredible experience at Staples Center.  We formally said goodbye to Kobe and Gigi, even though this is something we’ll probably never get over.  Vanessa Bryant you are an incredibly strong woman for standing up and speaking in front of all those people.  It was so beautifully done, and every performer and speaker was brilliant.    I also think that Michael Jordan and Shaq provided some much needed humor in their speeches, given how heavy the entire experience was.  Lay off Lebron people.  I have no idea if he was there or not.  However, the man has the right to grieve in his own way.  He’s definitely hurting like the rest of us.  In case you missed Shaq’s speech, this moment was perfect.

On the floor, the Lakers are still in 1st place in the West after taking down New Orleans yestserday.  I sure hope the Lakers don’t play the Pelicans in the 1st round.  Zion is a beast, and Brandon Ingram is going to be seeking revenge like Uma Thurman in Kill Bill.  I realize that Giannis is having a great season, and is the best player on the team with the best record.  However, Lebron James is truly the Most Valuable Player in the league.  In his 17th season season he leads the league in assists, and the advanced stats tell you he creates more quality scoring opportunities for others on the floor than any other player in the league.  According to those analytics, if the Lakers don’t have Lebron on the floor they are arguably a lottery team.  That makes him more valuable than anybody.  Lebron does also deserve an Oscar for overselling this foul.

As for the Clippers, they found the win column yesterday against a short-
handed 76ers team.  They have looked great in the last two games, but inconsistent in others.  It makes you wonder if they really are capable of throwing the switch come playoff time.  I’m sure they wish they could play the Lakers every night, since that’s the only team they get up for, but that’s not how the league works.   Thinking you can turn it on whenever you want is a dangerous way to play, and if they get bounced in the 2nd round or earlier because of it, it’s going to be another laughable embarrassment for the franchise given the hype around them.  The Clippers went full Clippers with having a Bumble patch on their jerseys. Consider that an app for when you’re trying to find friends in your city. That franchise is going to be Milhouse forever!

It’s nice to see the Dodgers moving past the Astros cheating scandal and playing good baseball in the spring.  Clayton Kershaw and Walker Beuhler have looked great, and so has Kenley Jansen.  Also good to see the offense clicking.  However, Kike Hernandez really needs to find some pants that aren’t so tight.  Kike you are going to start a forrest fire in there my man!

The Angels have given up hope on their pitching staff for Lent. The Halos were already dealt a blow to their pitching staff over the weekend when they learned that Garrett Canning will probably start the year on the IL with elbow troubles. Since he pitches for the Angels, that already makes me think he’s headed for Tommy John surgery. At this point, Arte Moreno looks like an even bigger dope for backing out of the deal that would have brought him Ross Stripling and Joc Pederson for a can of Coke. Stripling would have easily been a front of the rotation pitcher for the Angels, and eaten up a lot of innings. The season hasn’t even started yet, and it’s already beginning like last season.

UCLA Basketball is back! Well it’s coming back at least. The energy at Pauley Pavilion over the weekend was unbelievable. The Bruins have won 7 in a row, and 11 of 13, to climb into 1st place in the Pac-12. More importantly, Joe Lunardi now has UCLA projected to be a #12 seed in the NCAA Tournament. Bruin fans haven’t been this excited since Dan Guerrero announced his retirement. Mick Cronin can coach, and these guys are truly enjoying playing with each other. There probably aren’t 15 teams in the country playing better than the Bruins, so it’s going to be an exciting March, starting with a massive showdown against USC next Saturday to finish up the regular season.

Excellent episode of The Walking Dead last night on AMC. Spoiler alert for those of you who have yet to see it so read no further if you plan on watching it later. Judith was straight up Kevin McCallister shooting one of the “Wet Bandits” when she shot Beta in the shoulder. Can’t say I saw that one coming. You also have to love how Gamma was another prisoner that confessed her life story to Judith. She’s like a 9-year-old psychiatrist. Beta entering Alexandria from the grave was one of the creepiest things this show has ever created. His fight scene with Rosita was even more epic. She fared better than Daryl did against Alpha, especially since he got his butt saved by Lydia. I mean he did sit there and practically bleed to death while Lydia and Alpha went to therapy. I still can’t get used to the idea of Rosita and Gabriel being a couple. In any case, looking forward to next week’s episode!

Finally, The Bachelor is back tonight on ABC! This last episode killed me. I’m sure we all rolled our eyes when Peter told Victoria she had nothing to work on. So Victoria is fine going into a helicopter, yet she had a freaking panic attack going on an airplane? Oooookay that makes sense. Did nobody else notice that she actually used her dress as a tissue? How is that woman a medical device sales rep? A customer would ask her how the device worked and she would respond by saying “I don’t knowwwwww…..what do you want from me?” I can’t believe these lame producers tried to replicate the Titanic scene with Hannah Ann in the Fantasy Suite. You Bachelor Nation people are really killing me though. Last season, when Luke P slut shamed Hannah B you all killed him for it and came to his defense. Now that Madison is essentially slut shaming Peter, you all think it’s different and are coming to Madison’s defense. Bottom line though, Peter may be a dud, but he isn’t a jerk for sleeping with two other women he’s been dating for a few months, and Madison isn’t wrong for not wanting him to. They just have different values and therefore aren’t a good match. That explanation is probably too sensible for The Bachelor though.

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