May 15, 2017

Don’t worry Laker fans.  Tuesday isn’t that big of a deal.  It’s ONLY the entire future of the organization at stake for the next five years determined by a couple of ping pong balls.  The have a slightly less than 50% chance of keeping their 1st round pick this year, which has to be in the top 3 for it to belong to them.  With those kind of odds, I’d feel better if PWC and Warren Beaty were involved in the lottery, because it might actually improve the Lakers’ chances.  Somebody usually gets screwed every year.  Hopefully it’s not the Lake Show.  If they do end up keeping the pick though, I’m thinking they will try like hell to trade that pick for an all-star caliber player.

Then there’s the Clippers and their dilemma about what to do with JJ Redick.  The 32-year-old sharp shooter is seeking $18-20 million a year for his new contract.  Even if you love Redick as a player, trying to convince your owner to spend that much money on a player like him is like your wife trying to convince you to pay $700 for some pair of designer shoes that she can wear with one outfit. Those shoes will make your wife look nice, but you’re going to pay that much so she can look great every now and again with her one outfit? Redick is nice player, but there’s only one thing he can do great, and that’s shoot.  It’s a nice thing to have in your lineup, just like it’s nice for your wife to have those shoes in her wardrobe, but not at that price.  We are talking about the NBA though, so somebody is probably going to be dumb enough to pay the price for him.

As for the rest of the NBA playoffs, the Spurs missed their chance to steal the momentum against the Warriors yesterday.  Golden State was rusty and San Antonio let that chance slip away.  The Warriors are so good that not even Mike Brown coaching them against Greg Popovovich can prevent them from winning.  As for the James Harden disastrous performance against the Spurs, superstars can have bad games in the playoffs, but nobody repeatedly has the body language and disinterest in big games that Harden has had the last couple of years.  He reminds me of the dude you work with who is sitting in the meeting and looking at his watch every 5 minutes because he’s just punching the clock and doesn’t care about the final result.   Next time he should book his vacation plans later in the summer instead of during the playoffs.  There’s also a great new Shaq and Kobe NBA 2K commercial.  Nice to see these two playing nice these days.

What would Monday Morning Coffee be without an update on Lavar Ball? The latest outrageous comment to come out of his mouth is that his son doesn’t need advice from Kobe Bryant, and that Lonzo will not take his game and “pattern after nobody”.  The real stupidity in his comment that nobody is talking about is how this will impact his “Big Baller Brand” business.  Kobe Bryant’s followers are cult like, and frequently threaten to impound your car, riot, and then demand that you are ejected from the universe if you say anything bad about The Black Mamba.  Whether or not Lonzo plays for the Lakers, he still needs to sell sneakers.  Kobe fans buy sneakers, and they sure won’t be buying Lonzo’s new sneakers after The Mamba was dissed.  Lavar and his brand just lost a big potential customer.

After 38 games, here’s what you need to know about the Dodgers.  15 of their 22 wins have come against teams under .500.  The are just 7-9 against teams over .500, so they aren’t very good against real teams.  Also, of their 7 losses to teams under .500, 4 of them have come against one of the worst teams in baseball, the Giants.  Remind me again why you people are excited about the potential of this team? The best thing about the Dodgers is Clayton Kershaw and Cody Bellinger.  The worst thing is Andrew Friedman and his data driven approach that has proven nothing in a big market.

Then there’s the Angels.  Remember when we thought the Halos would have no problem scoring runs? Well in 12 of their last 20 games, they’ve been held to 3 runs or less.  It’s not hard to figure out why either.  When you stick three guys in your lineup regularly that can barely hit .200, you aren’t going to get much production.  Is Billy Eppler really incapable of finding a better left fielder or 2nd baseman?  I know Mike Trout is the greatest player since the Dinosaurs roamed the earth, but not even he can make up for the rest of the stiffs hitting around him.  I’d also like to thank Garrett Richards for his stupidity in not having Tommy Johns surgery last summer, resulting in him “hoping” he’ll be back from his latest arm injury in September.  It’s going to take this guy 3 years to get his body right instead of the 1 year it should have taken.

That Anaheim Ducks playoff game was really something last night.  The Ducks had such a bad start to the game, they showed up even later than their fans usually do.  They were also fortunate that Nashville goalie Pekka Rinne managed to play like he took a few too many shots of tequila at J.T. Schmid’s Brewery across the street prior to the game.  That series looks like it will go 7 games. The NHL also has absolutely no shame in it’s choice of sponsors.

I can’t believe that we have to wait two more months for the first half of the final season of Game of Thrones!  Maybe what they really meant by “Winter Is Coming” is that it’s going to take so long to get to the last season that global warming might actually put us into another ice age by the time we get to see it.  I’m looking forward to it, but given the pace of the show so far, I have a hard time imagining that we’re going to get a satisfying conclusion to the show in another 12 episodes or so.