December 7th, 2015
This is obviously a lot closer to Tuesday Morning Coffee, but with everything going on, much to get to nonetheless. Zack Greinke is gone, just like I told you he would be months ago. I think the question needs to be asked at this point: is Andrew Friedman an idiot or was he brought in to destroy the team? It feels like just yesterday that the Dodgers were spending money on players like Charlie Sheen spends money on hookers and blow. They even spent $62 million on unproven Cuban players like Hector Olivera, but now you’re telling me they got outbid by Arizona by $50 million for a proven elite pitcher? I’m sure some of you will argue that it isn’t reasonable to give a pitcher over 30 years of age over $30 million a year. However, it also isn’t reasonable to spend $30 on a hot dog and a beer at the game, but fans do it because it’s just the cost associated with watching a good baseball team. Of course Friedman foolishly would rather spend $45 million on what’s likely to be three injury plagued years of Hisashi Iwakuma, then twice that on 3-4 years of brilliance on Greinke. This may have something to do with the Dodgers not actually being able to distribute the SportsNet LA channel due to failed negotiations, which ultimately is putting pressure on Time Warner, and in turn putting pressure on them to give back financially to TWC and lower their payroll. Either way, Friedman is still an idiot for trading Dee Gordon, and trading Matt Kemp for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. He’s also about to waste what’s left of Clayton Kershaw’s prime. Even if they get Ardolis Chapman, they will only be renting him for a year. Get ready for a crappy few years Dodger fans. We’ve now become a small market baseball team.
Meanwhile, the Angels may not be going after any big name pitchers, but they are rumored to be in the mix for Jason Heyward. If somehow the Halos could lock up the 26 year old outfielder, and bring back Howie Kendrick at 2nd base, I’d really like their chances in the American League, let alone the AL West. The Angels still have some very good arms in their rotation, and they’ll also have some payroll coming off the books next year to spend big now. The Angels are also shopping pitcher CJ Wilson, and at this point, most fans would gladly pack his bags for him and drive him to the airport.
To the NBA, where this Kobe circus is just too much. We have to endure 60 more games of this farewell tour? Look, I love Kobe, but I echo the sentiments of Jerry West, in that it’s just too damn painful to watch him like this. It’s like watching Batman get his ass kicked by Bain. It’s like watching Superman get destroyed by Lex Luther. Or Spiderman get beat down by the Green Goblin. I totally understand the idea that he needs to say goodbye, and that he’s never cared about his critics, and is finishing his career by raging against them once again. There may be poetic beauty in that, but there isn’t aesthetic beauty in watching him shoot 30% from the field every game. It’s been so bad and Byron Scott’s rotation decisions have been so bizarre of late that you have to wonder if he’s doing this on purpose. There’s still a lot better ways for this team to lose than this. D’Angelo Russell and Jordan Clarkson pay the price the most for this circus tour, as it will only delay their growth and development. At least Byron Scott is giving the Lakers a great chance of landing a franchise player, in Ben Simmons.
As for the Clippers, they are just treading water with a recent win over Orlando. They stink on the road, and now they have a 5 game trip coming up against some soft competition, so this would be a good time for them to pretend like they have it together. You think Kobe’s 27% shooting is embarrassing? The real embarrassment is DeAndre Jordan getting a max contract and not even being able to make a free throw.
To College Football, where USC was basically one bad Saturday afternoon away from having buyers remorse about the Clay Helton hire. Sure enough, that bad Saturday afternoon came a couple of days ago, when they lost to Stanford in the Pac 12 Championship game. The Trojans were totally outmatched by the Cardinal, who played their typical smash mouth style of football, running the ball and controlling the clock. USC should be able to handle business in the Holiday Bowl against a Wisconsin team that has been about as impressive President Obama’s last term in office. However, wait until early next season when they’ll probably have to face the preseason #1 team in Alabama, which should bring out the Helton haters quickly. Of course there’s never a dull moment in Trojans football, as Steve Sarkisian is now suing the program for wrongful termination. This was somewhat predictable, but definitely a sign from Sark that he knows he’s never going to get another head coaching job again, so he’s trying to squeeze the University for as much money as possible.
UCLA got exactly what they deserve: A crappy bowl game in a crappy city, against an even crappier team.
The College Football Playoff selection committee had an easy job picking Clemson, Alabama, Oklahoma, and Michigan State. Of course, if the best SEC team had 1 win, I’m sure the committee would find a way to get them in playoff regardless. The Ohio State vs Notre Dame Fiesta Bowl is going to be fantastic, and is a great accomplishment for a Notre Dame team that has suffered so many injuries, they’ll probably lose somebody else by the time you’re done reading this. That’s easily the best matchup outside of the playoff games. What a dumpy Rose Bowl matchup though: Stanford vs Iowa? That’s like having to eat stale leftovers on Thanksgiving Day. Meanwhile, this Texas player must have thought his Bae was watching….
I don’t know what got into UCLA basketball the other night. They actually took down the #1 team in the country in Kentucky, and even more impressive was the fact that the fans acted like they had been there before and didn’t storm the court. The Bruins actually looked like they were well coached in that one, and they even played defense. That’s bizarre from a Steve Alford team. As a reward, maybe Dan Guerrero will let Steve Alford fly first class, since he complains about that. Then again, you would think he can afford it with his $2.7 million salary. Meanwhile, John Calipari is sure to punish his players by taking away the cars and cell phones he gave them.
Finally, week 13 of the NFL was another wild one. Aaron Rodgers will probably never stop laughing after that last second Hail Mary win against the Lions. That final play was very symbolic of Detroit Lions football. Tom Brady should have been throwing passes to himself on Sunday. Suddenly, the Pats are kind of a wreck. Brock Osweiler is now going to replace Peyton Manning in all his Papa John’s commercials, in addition to being the starting quarterback. Remember when Jeff Fisher’s football teams used to be good? They haven’t been in a while. The Rams stink. The Jets and the Bucs have come out of nowhere to contend for Wild Card spots. The Seahawks looked elite again and so do the Chiefs, while the Raiders, Chargers, and Browns look like trash. Funny how all the teams that suck might actually be moving to SoCal next year. Sounds about right….NFL Football back in SoCal.