
March 16, 2026
Let’s begin with the outrage machine currently churning in Westwood. Some UCLA fans are upset about the Bruins drawing a tough road in the East as a No. 7 seed in the NCAA Tournament. Tough path? Of course it’s a tough path. This is the NCAA Tournament, not the Big West Tournament where the scariest opponent might be a team that traveled by bus. UCLA actually looked pretty solid in the Big Ten Tournament and probably could’ve taken down Purdue if Donovan Dent and Tyler Bilodeau weren’t operating on half-health and ibuprofen. The good news: they’ll be healthy and rested next week, which is exactly the kind of thing that tends to make Mick Cronin teams annoying in March. If the bracket breaks the right way, don’t be shocked if the Bruins stumble into the Sweet 16… or even the Elite Eight… before inevitably losing a rock fight where both teams shoot 32%.
Speaking of the tournament, let’s address the March Madness bracket itself. Every year we pretend this is a puzzle that can be solved with careful analysis and spreadsheets. It’s not. It’s chaos with sneakers. But if we’re pretending to be rational adults for a moment, four teams look like they’re operating on a different level: Duke, Michigan State, Arizona, and Florida. They’ve been head and shoulders above the rest of the field. Of course, now that I’ve said that, one of them will probably lose to a No. 13 seed whose star player majors in agricultural science. That’s why everyone’s bracket—yours, mine, your coworker who claims he “studies mid-major efficiency metrics”—will be obliterated by Sunday and ceremoniously repurposed as toilet paper.

Meanwhile in the NBA, it turns out the Lakers can beat good teams after all. Who knew? In the past week they’ve knocked off the Knicks, Timberwolves, and Nuggets while climbing back to the No. 3 seed in the West. Even more shocking: they’re playing defense. Yes, defense. With Luka Dončić, LeBron James, and Austin Reaves on the floor together. Somewhere in basketball heaven, Red Auerbach just spit out his cigar. Deandre Ayton even managed to defend Nikola Jokić like a guy who remembered he’s seven feet tall. And Austin Reaves delivered one of the smartest plays of the season with the intentional free-throw miss and put-back to force overtime. If the media keeps telling us the Lakers roster is flawed, shouldn’t Luka be a stronger MVP candidate for dragging them up the standings? And can we stop acting surprised that LeBron can adjust his game? The man has been adapting his style since half the league was still in middle school. Credit where it’s due: LeBron’s doing the hustle stuff, JJ Redick has the team buying into roles, and Charles Barkley is somewhere on television looking emotionally exhausted by the whole thing.

Just down the freeway in Inglewood , the Clippers are once again experiencing their annual spin on the Injury Wheel of Fortune. Just when things looked stable, Kawhi Leonard went down with another ankle injury. And if that wasn’t enough cosmic trolling, their four-game win streak ended courtesy of the Sacramento Kings—featuring a revenge triple-double from Russell Westbrook. Yes, that Russell Westbrook. The one who occasionally shoots like the rim insulted his family. For one night, though, he looked like vintage Westbrook, carving up his former team while Clippers fans quietly contemplated the fragile nature of hope.

Over on the baseball diamond, the World Baseball Classic has once again proven that international baseball is wildly entertaining… and occasionally chaotic. Team USA manager Mark DeRosa nearly got eliminated early because he didn’t fully understand the tournament’s tie-breaking rules. That’s the kind of thing you’d expect from someone filling out their office pool, not managing the national team. Fortunately, someone eventually explained the math before disaster struck, and the U.S. is now headed to Tuesday night’s final. There’s probably extra motivation now after that close call. And yes, it would sting to see Shohei Ohtani disappointed—but considering he spent years playing for the Angels, disappointment is basically muscle memory at this point. From a Dodgers perspective, Japan exiting early might actually be a blessing. It means Ohtani and Yoshinobu Yamamoto get a little extra rest before the season begins.

Speaking of teams that actually look like they know what they’re doing, the Rams continue to treat roster construction like a home renovation show. Their latest upgrade: signing Chiefs cornerback Jaylen Watson to a three-year deal, further strengthening a secondary that was easily their weakest unit last year. Suddenly that problem looks… fixed. Just like that. The Rams now look like legitimate contenders again, which raises the obvious question: what do they do in the draft? The safest bet is reinforcing the offensive and defensive lines, because you can never have too many big humans whose job description is “push the other big humans backward.”

And finally, a stick tap to Anze Kopitar of the Los Angeles Kings, who became the franchise’s all-time leading scorer over the weekend, breaking a record that stood for 45 years. That’s the kind of longevity and excellence you almost never see in one uniform anymore. Unfortunately, the timing is bittersweet because the Kings look about as close to a Stanley Cup run as a Zamboni driver playing goalie again. But records like this force an interesting debate: is Kopitar the greatest LA King ever? Wayne Gretzky is unquestionably the greatest player who ever wore the jersey, but greatness within a franchise is different. Two Cups, nearly two decades of leadership, and now the scoring record? Yeah. It’s fair to say Anze Kopitar isn’t just a Kings legend—he’s the LA King.


















































