Monday Morning Coffee

September 20, 2021

Everyone’s goal in life should be to find someone that looks at you the way that Matt Stafford looks at Cooper Kupp. Kupp came up with 163 yards receiving and two huge touchdowns, in yesterday’s big road win against the Colts. It was also a small coming out party for Sony Michel, who picked up 46 yards late in the game. There are few things that are certain in life: death, taxes, and Daryl Henderson getting injured. That definitely explains why the Rams gave up picks to get Michel, who stepped in nicely for Henderson. Two weeks in and two nice wins for the Rams. Next week will be tough against the Bucs, who have been tearing up the NFL themselves.

Then there’s the Chargers. The referees clearly didn’t do them any favors yesterday, but some things still haven’t changed. The Chargers still can’t seem to get it done in close games, and their home games are largely attended by the opposing teams fans. Not even a new stadium can stop that from happening. You would think Clay Helton was coaching the Bolts yesterday with all the penalties that were taken. Even Lebron and Magic probably went to that game yesterday to see the Cowboys, rather than to see the Chargers play. It’s a whole new season with a whole new stadium, but nothing feels like it’s changed.

Elsewhere around the NFL, the Steelers were as terrible as their towels in their loss to the Raiders yesterday. Lamar Jackson put the Chiefs defenders on ice skates, in the Ravens win over KC. Baker Mayfield and the Browns are really good, and Mayfield hasn’t even started grabbing his crotch yet this season. Zach Wilson had more turnovers than Betty Crocker in the Patriots beat down of the Jets. The 49ers beat the Eagles in a game that was sloppier than a happy hour with the Kardashians. The Bucs dismantled the Falcons, and Tom Brady continues to just give the middle finger to Father Time.

To the College ranks, where it’s safe to say it was an eventful week for USC Football. The Trojans shocked the world by firing Clay Helton after the Stanford game. It remains to be seen if this was just a publicity stunt to appease the fan base, or if they really plan on getting serious about winning again. If James Franklin, Luke Fickell, or Matt Campbell ends up as the next coach, they are serious. If not, they are still the same underachieving program of the last decade. On the field though a win over Washington State isn’t anything to make you want to go party on fraternity row. However, the Trojans might have a QB controversy on their hands. Jaxson Dart looked damn good, and it makes you wonder if he’s the best quarterback on the team right now, given the ineptitude of the previous coaching staff. Plus if nothing else, Jason Dart sounds like a great QB name. Only time will tell, but it seems like Dart might get another chance next week against Oregon State.

As for UCLA, they came crashing back to earth on Saturday night at the Rose Bowl. The Bruins lost to Fresno State late in the 4th, and they looked about as prepared as I am to date Jennifer Aniston. The defense was simply not there. The offense was unable to execute. For a team that beat “the mighty LSU” this was a trap game they badly fell into. I don’t know about you, but Chip Kelly suddenly looks like the same scrub coach he’s been for the last few years. There’s still time, and Fresno State might even be solid, but Bruins fans can’t be nearly as optimistic about this team as they were a week ago.

The Dodgers have only 12 games left in the regular season, but they still trail the Giants by one game in the NL West. The good news for LA is that Clayton Kershaw is back, and he looks great. The bad news is that the Padres are sinking like the Titanic, so they might not be able to help the Dodgers catch the Giants like we thought they might. It’s ridiculous though that Giants broadcaster Dave Fleming was talking smack on the Dodger pitchers, suggesting that the foreign substance crackdown has harmed the LA pitching staff. That’s simply an ignorant take since the Dodger pitchers are statistically far superior to the Giants pitchers. Then again it’s the Giants, so why should we be surprised? Here’s to hoping the Dodgers can stick it to Flemming and the Giants before the season is over.

The Clippers had an adorable ceremony to celebrate the ground breaking of their new Intuit Arena. It should open in 2024-2025, and Steve Ballmer is hyping up the fact there are more bathrooms in this arena than any other. That’s really not a selling point Steve, unless the bathrooms are symbolic of all the toilet bowl worthy playoff performances we’ve seen from the Clips. On the court though, the Clippers are rumored to be pursuing John Wall. Wall is a distressed asset, who would actually be a nice addition for anybody. He’s expensive, but he can still play. I have a hard time seeing anybody come up with matching salaries to make a trade for him though.

Finally, The Walking Dead went down on AMC last night. Name a more cheesy video than the Commonwealth introduction clip. I’ll wait. It had some real “Lost” Dharma Initiative vibes. Aaron basically turned into Shane right there and lost his mind. Herschel almost being the same damn age as Judith makes no freaking sense. That one Hilltop walker has some gorgeous looking hair. It’s so perfect. Makes me think someone in the apocalypse is styling the hair of walkers. Where did Heath go after all this time? Does anybody remember him? I would ask the same thing about Connie, but AMC spilled the beans that we’re going to see her next week. There’s a weird almost sexual tension between Negan and Maggie. Looking forward to the last three episodes of this year!

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