August 9, 2021

One-week later, I suddenly don’t mind the Lakers adding Russell Westbrook to their team. That’s because Rob Pelinka should be arrested for shoplifting. Kendrick Nunn for the tax payer MLE? Malik Monk for the minimum? Carmelo and Dwight for the minimum? They now have the shooting they were missing, they can still defend, and they aren’t nearly as old as you think they are. Heck, the average age of the Nets is older than the Lakers. Then there’s Dennis Schroder, who really flexed his muscle didn’t he? He’s probably calling Verizon and asking why his phone isn’t working because nobody is calling him. I wonder who fires who first: him or his agent? In all seriousness though, he’s still a solid player who made a poor decision, but it’s unfortunate the Lakers have no place for him now. Glad to see Frank Vogel get the contract extension he deserved because the Lakers typically pay as much for coaches as you pay for chicken nuggets. I’m super disappointed about Alex Caruso though. As punishment for tampering, the Bulls should have to pay Caruso’s salary against the cap and send him back to LA. However, the bottom line is that if the Lakers stay healthy, they have a great chance to come out of the West and potentially win an NBA Championship.

As for the Clippers, their offseason has been rather uneventful and that’s probably the way they preferred it. Kawhi waited for five days to tell the Clippers he was coming back. However, that’s also because nobody was willing to wait around for him while other free agents were signed. I’m sure they also didn’t want to listed to Uncle Dennis ask for Yachts and Private Planes in Kawhi’s next contract. The Clips did manage to sign Justice Winslow, while retaining Nic Batum and Reggie Jackson. Given that Kawhi didn’t exactly make his commitment public, it probably made it difficult for the Clips to do anything beyond that anyway, since free agents had to be wondering about him. Everyone is also wondering about his health, and Lawrence Frank didn’t make anybody feel better about it because he suggested he’s going to be out for a while. A while might be all of next season, which definitely puts a limit on how far the Clippers might be able to go.

Elsewhere around NBA free agency, it’s safe to say the biggest winners were the Lakers, Suns, Kyle Lowry’s tax returns, Trevor Ariza’s real estate broker, FIBA, and Duncan Robinson’s podcast producer. The biggest losers were the Kings, Colby White, the NFL Players Association, all of Chris Broussard’s “sources”, Cameron Payne’s agent, and whoever cleaned Benny The Bull’s popcorn mess. Also, the Blazers, T-Wolves, and Pelicans might as well just trade their stars now since the executives running those teams look they can’t even run a hot dog stand right now.

To baseball, where the Dodgers continue to frustrate their fans. Or maybe it’s just that the Giants are frustrating the Dodgers because their NL West lead keeps getting bigger. The Dodgers took 2 of 3 from the Angels over the weekend, but there is concern. Max Scherzer and Trea Turner look amazing, but Clayton Kershaw is not coming back until September, and Trevor Bauer doesn’t appear to be coming back at all. Bauer’s attorneys keep leaking text messages that might as well be straight out of Porn Hub due to their graphic nature. I’m beginning to lose confidence in the bullpen, and when the game goes into extra innings this season, you might as well beat the traffic because the Dodgers are going to lose. I’m also still wondering what the hell is up with Cody Bellinger’s swing. This dude was an MVP two years ago, and now he can’t even bat .200. I feel like the Dodgers hitting coaches should be fired just for mismanaging that. Yes, on paper this team looks amazing. But right now they don’t play on paper which is a problem.

Meanwhile, the Angels sound like they are waiving the white flag on the season, even before their series with the Dodgers. The Halos started Sunday 7 games back in the AL Wild Card and 10 games back in the AL West. Anthony Rendon is now out for the season and Mike Trout might be done as well. Reid Detmers and Chris Rodriguez are getting called up, along with Jo Adell and Brandon Marsh. This is as close to a rebuild as the Angels can get. They have refused to admit they are rebuilding with Mike Trout on their roster. Now that Trout is hurt, they can at least pretend like they are. The Halos did a pretty good job of pretending to be buyers at the trade deadline, and now they are pretending to rebuild. It’s cute and all, but ultimately this team needs to figure out how to get wins against Oakland and Houston. Every time you think the team is going to turn the corner, the A’s smack them right back into their place and remind them just how far away they are. That feeling is probably here to stay for at least the rest of the season.

The Summer Olympics wrapped up last night with the closing Ceremony. After all that talk about the US disappointing, They finished with the most medals and most gold medals of any country, . Sure, we didn’t see as much of Simone Biles as we wanted. Sure, we wanted more gold medals from the men’s track team. However, men’s and women’s basketball, women’s water polo, and women’s beach and indoor volleyball claimed gold. Watching Allyson Felix was a pleasure, and I’m very happy she won a gold in her last Olympic event. Also, when the US gets a medal over a Kenyan in any long distance running event, it might as well count as multiple golds. There were plenty of wonderful moments for the athletes that represented our country. I also love how the Russian team, who cannot call themselves “The Russian Team” because they’ve been banned for cheating, is outraged at the possibility that there may be cheating going on in rhythmic gymnastics judging. I’m gonna miss the games, but I’m definitely worried about their future. There’s only a few countries that can support hosting the games without bankrupting their entire country. If the IOC actually gave a damn, they would do something about this. However, why would we think one of the most corrupt organizations in the world would care?

Finally, the Bachelorette is back tonight on ABC with the season finale. Well we’re down to two dudes left. One of them is nothing but an expert in funny faces, and the other is as boring as watching paint dry. I’m not sure which side of the Greg-Katie breakup you’re on, but I’m on Team Greg here. Say what you will about his obnoxious attachment style, but he poured his heart out to Katie. Instead all he heard back was “I love looking at you.” Sure he needs a good therapist, but who on that show doesn’t? For those of you that say she didn’t need to say she loves him in that moment, this is The Bachelorette. She’s dating 2 other dudes, so of course he needs to hear it. Anybody that uses the word “gaslighting” when describing Greg must have some kind of emotional PTSD from a bad relationship. Homie is supposed to propose in two weeks so he needs at least a little affirmation.

August 2, 2021

There is much to discuss in this explosive edition of Monday Morning Coffee. Starting off with the Lakers, who acquired Russell Westbrook a few days ago. This would have been amazing move……9 years ago. I have great respect for how hard Russ plays every night, but I’ve seen square pegs that fit better into round holes than Russ fits with this roster. The Lakers desperately need shooting. Russ is not a greater shooter at all. This would be ok if it were 1985. It’s 2021. Lebron and AD need shooters around them, and they just lost their best shooter on the team in KCP in the trade. It’s only fair to let Rob Pelinka fill out the rest of the roster before judging, but if we’re talking about the deal at face value, I hate it. Even worse, all the dudes I keep hearing about that want to joint the Lakers like DeMar Derozan, can’t shoot either. Rob has done a lot of amazing things in his time running the Lakers, but I sure hope when free agency opens today, he spends time dining at Nobu with guys who can actually shoot the basketball from 3.

As for the Clippers, it’s been more quiet than a library when it comes to rumors surrounding this team. Serge Ibaka opted into his contract over the weekend, which is no surprise for a dude that just came off back surgery. The real question though is what is going on with Kawhi. Is he the type of dude that is going to go get a couple of free dinners or lunches from teams and entertain leaving, or is he the type of dude that is just going to re-sign with the Clippers after opting out immediately? For the record, if I were an NBA free agent I would be dining with 30 teams, and enjoying a nice meal every night. Kawhi doesn’t seem like that dude though, even though his uncle clearly is. As weird as Kawhi is, he would probably just take an order of chicken wings and re-sign with the Clippers. Either way, he’s weird enough to make any Clipper fan very nervous right now until he actually re-signs.

To baseball where the Dodgers pulled off an absolutely stunning trade deadline. They acquired Max Scherzer and Trea Turner from the Washington Nationals. My hat goes off to Andrew Friedman, who is no longer running this team like some small market poor house in Milwaukee or Tampa Bay. There’s still plenty to be uneasy about, like not winning the division and a one-game playoff against the Padres. However, at least the Dodgers appear to have pitching re-enforcements now that Trevor Bauer probably isn’t coming back. It also doesn’t hurt that the Nationals “threw in” Turner, who is a top 15 position player, and makes the lineup even more insane. Are the Giants and Padres ever going to play each other though? Who are the lunatics that made this years baseball schedule? There’s still much work to do for the Dodgers and weird things happen in baseball all the time, but at least Andrew Friedman has done everything he can to help the Dodgers defense the World Series Championship.

As for the Angels, they had a bizarre trade deadline. They tried to get in on a Max Scherzer trade. Then pivoted toward trading Andrew Heaney and Tony Watson for some Clam Chowder and a slice of New York Pizza. Then they decided to hold onto their most valuable trade assets like Raisel Iglesias and Alex Cobb. The weird change of direction is just another sign of poor leadership. The Halos entered Sunday 6 games back of the last Wild Card in the AL, but with 5 teams they had to climb over. They are further away from the playoffs than you really think. Don’t tell that to Alex Cobb though, who was quoted saying this team is on the verge of winning a championship. Cobb is clearly violating the leagues substance abuse policy and needs to be tested immediately after making such an absurd statement.

Let’s get to the Summer Olympics, where Simone Biles is either the GOAT or a quitter depending on if you ask the Republicans or Democrats these days. Leave it to the media to politicize even this in 2021. In reality the truth is typically somewhere in between. Biles has already proven herself to be arguably the greatest female gymnasts based on her accomplishments. She has secured an overwhelming number of World Championships and Olympic Medals compared to her predecessors and peers. Of course electing not to compete prevented her from further enhancing that legacy. I’m not sure she needed to though, because her legacy is pretty secure. It also ended up giving one of her teammates the opportunity to win a gold medal in the individual all-around. If you look at her video practicing, she did also recognize that she was completely off her game, and probably would have been a detriment to herself and her team. You’ve gotta at least give her credit for recognizing that. She’s still great no matter how you want to characterize it, even if you think she quit in this Olympics.

USA Men’s Basketball is now on to the the elimination round with a matchup against Spain up next. Sure they beat up on the Czech Republic and Iran, but that doesn’t exactly inspire confidence for them winning the gold medal. My favorite was when Damian Lillard said that these NBA players playing for their countries in the Olympics play much differently. So do you Dame……so do you! I also really enjoyed when Zach Lavine jumped into some contact on a 3-pointer against the Czech Republic and looked at the referee to bail him out. The FIBA referee looked at him like 50 Cent looked in that GIF when he was driving away. The referee was thinking “they call that bs in the NBA?” I’m sure these USA NBA players will be hugging the referees when they get back home.

To the ice where we haven’t talked about the LA Kings in a while. Look Rob Blake, I get it, you have drafted a really nice group of prospects. However, if you have no plan to develop or create infrastructure around them, you’ll be rebuilding for eternity. That’s exactly what’s happening. All of the Kings best prospects play center, and few play wing. They lack elite defenseman in their system, and their entire system has abandoned the concept of defense. Perhaps the Kings got marginally better in the short-term with the free agents they signed, but to me all they did was prevent their prospects from having an opportunity to develop and flourish with the guys they added. Things could be worse though. They could be the San Jose Sharks, who are dealing with a gambling scandal on their team. The story is ridiculous too, because no serious gambler would ever bet on the Sharks.

Finally, The Bachelorette went down last week on ABC, and it was “The Men Tell All.” However, that part felt like it was about 20 minutes, since Katie didn’t even want to make eye contact with anyone that didn’t please her. So Michael left the show, but his son is a pretty smart kid. He asked his dad why he’s leaving his love life to the fate of a game show, when he’s a walking E-Harmony date. I also love the drama ABC tried to build up with Michael walking to Katie’s hotel door. Of course it’s going to be Katie’s hotel room he’s going to! He’s not going to see the head of catering and events at the hotel. I’m sure Connor is calling all his exes to ask about his kissing skills after that episode. My thoughts and prayers are with the girl who showed up in a full cat costume just to watch Connor make out with some random other girl in the crowd. The worst part about Justin making it to hometowns is WE WERE ROBBED of his reactions during “The Men Tell All”. I’m not really sold on any of the guys remaining for Katie, nor am I sold on Katie anymore at this point, but I think she likely ends up with Blake. We’ll have to wait two more episodes to find out, but it’s going to take a lot to convince me otherwise.

July 26, 2021

The Summer Olympics finally got underway this weekend. As weird as it is without any fans, it’s still special to watch these athletes competing and representing their countries. Except for those dogs playing for our USA Men’s basketball team. More on them in a moment. Thank goodness for our wonderful swim team, who led the way this weekend with 6 of our 10 medals. The US is expected to win the medal count according to the betting odds. However, the stakes should really be much higher than this. If we finish with more medals than China and Russia, the Chinese should be forced to stop taking our jobs for the next four years, and the Russians should be forced to stop safe harboring our hackers. I forever thought that badminton was just some sport that you played at a family reunion because nobody brought a football. It turns out it’s actually an Olympic sport. It’s these types of obscure sports that I enjoy watching most over these three weeks. USA Women’s softball could sure give the Dodgers some tips on how to hit in the clutch, as they did in their extra inning win over Australia. Watching Simon Biles dominate puts women’s gymnastics in perspective for. To me the women are arguably more skilled in their sport than the men.

As for the USA Men’s Basketball team, Kevin Durant will probably demand a trade to team France after yesterday’s loss to the Frenchman. I’m sure Greg Popovich is going to try and convince us that they are getting better and gaining more chemistry with every day they play together. Apparently nobody has told Pop that his team could be done playing in a week if they don’t get it together now. Not having a true point guard, a dominant big man, or lackadaisical defense isn’t doing this squad any favors. Heck, the way we assemble rosters in the NBA might not be how we should assemble rosters in International Play, especially since referees don’t fall for American embellishment to get to the free throw line. Every player on Team USA is going to hug the NBA referees when they get home. It turns out this dude from Rush Hour was right all along.

Speaking of basketball, congratulations to the Milwaukee Bucks on winning the 2021 NBA Championship. I admire any team, especially small market, that knows it’s window to win and takes advantage of it with big moves. The Bucks did exactly that by trading for Jrue Holiday and then getting Giannis to sign his supermax extension. That was the piece that put them over the top. Funny how the last few months everybody formed their own narrative that Giannis is limited, will never be able to shoot, and was some fraudulent NBA star. It turns out he found his true identity by dominating in the paint, and all he really needed was for his teammates to step up. Giannis is a great superstar, and a great guy that’s easy to root for. Here’s to bonehead NBA media now having to re-create their narrative around a player they got wrong once again.

The NBA off-season rumor mill has gotten ridiculous yet again. NBA Twitter is now pushing noise that the Lakers are going to acquire Russell Westbrook or Chris Paul once free agency begins next week. These are the types of ideas that are written on post-it notes and put up on a kitchen fridge, but the practicality of them never gets executed. That’s probably how this rumor started. These names are fun to throw around and all, but reality is that the Lakers probably aren’t going to give up 4 players for a $40 million Russell Westbrook that can’t shoot, or a $100 million aging Chris Paul. However, what is realistic and a huge help to the Lakers is Montrezl Harrell opting into his contract. At worst, ‘Trez is a nice trade asset. An expiring deal for a former 6th man of the year with upside. He might even still be a solid backup center off the bench for the Lakers. Either way, it’s a good situation for this team.

Memo to the Dodgers: summer is supposed to be fun. I can’t do this every night. The stress level, anxiety, and frustration you have caused us fans in the last week has been off the charts. Kenley has been phenomenal all year, but he sure picked a horrible week to collapse. The Dodgers have blown so many opportunities in the past week, by now they should be a couple of games up on the Giants. I’m also not sure what hell the Dodgers hitting coaches have been doing with Cody Bellinger’s swing. This dude is totally lost at the plate, and trying to hit everything to Mars every time he comes to bat. It’s like Andruw Jones has been working with him. I would love to see the Dodgers go get Max Scherzer this week, and add a high leverage bullpen arm to give them some insurance for Kenley Jansen. However, given Andrew Friedman’s propensity to hold on to prospects, I have my doubts we’ll see it.

The Angels are back in the news, and it’s not because Shohei Ohtani is hitting home runs like Babe Ruth. It’s because once again, Arte Moreno is being criticized for being a cheapskate owner. This time, it’s minor leaguers in their system, who are claiming that their living conditions have become unbearable and have impacted their mental health. In general, minor league conditions are terrible. However, do you realize how bad minor league conditions are in this case if players are actually complaining about it? Kieran Lovegrove , an active minor league pitcher in the Angels organization, is quoted in an ESPN piece saying that Arte “doesn’t give a “sh** about the winning side”. This dude is basically saying that Donald Trump would feed him better food with his fast food at the White House than the Halos are providing him. What joke! It’s no wondering the player development for the Halos has sucked. I feel bad for Lovegrove though, who’s career will probably end faster than that of the career of Vanilla Ice after these comments.

Awful news for the Rams last week, losing stud running back Cam Akers to a torn achilles injury. That’s some kick in the balls for this team. As much of a genius as Les Snead is, it’s not exactly like he can find Barry Sanders to plug in the lineup to replace Akers. We’ve seen how much different a Sean McVay offense is without a dynamic run game, especially when Todd Gurley was no longer the same player he once was, and how good they became once Akers began to emerge. I’m sure Darrell Henderson will get his shot, but he’s seemed a little bit frail in the early going in his career. Here’s to hoping I’m wrong, but this doesn’t bode well for the Rams.

Finally, another episode of The Bachelorette went down last week. Everyone is asking themselves how the hell Katie managed to keep Justin and Blake over Andrew. However, perhaps the worst line in Bachelorette history was Mike P saying “She reminds me of my mom.” I think everybody got chills down their spine when they heard that, and not in a good way. Even more bizarre was Katie chasing Andrew out, like she didn’t just shatter his heart into a 1,000 pieces. He had perhaps the classiest exit in the history of the show though. The man might have set himself up to be the next Bachelor. Nice strategic move by the producers to put the virgin on the sexual cuddling date. Greg has to be the most vanilla bland ass dude I’ve seen in a while on the show. Too bad she and Greg have been wearing matching outfits, which makes me think the fix is in and he’s going to win when it’s over.

July 19, 2021

Shohei Ohtani hit his 34th home run of the season in yesterday’s loss to the Mariners. That’s cool but I guess it’s not really that significant because Ohtani just isn’t marketing because he has a translator……well at least according to Stephen A Smith. What a stupid take on a television network that is becoming even more stupid by the day. I want to see greatness. I don’t need to hear it speak. If anything, Ohtani is actually more marketable because he’s a Japanese superstar, meaning he has more potential for global relevancy. I don’t know if there is supporting data to show that a foreign born player is more marketable than one who isn’t, but I do know that there are international superstars like Lionel Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo, and Roger Federer, who’s marketability is certainly not damaged because English might not be their first language. Ohtani was also the brightest star of them all during the all-star festivities. He got the win as a starter, had tons of fun, and even gave the fans some thrills before being eliminated in the home run derby. The Angels reminded us over the weekend that they still look as bad as they did before the break, but Ohtani is a star worth the price of admission, and he was the brightest star during the all-star festivities.

As for the Dodgers, they blew a big opportunity yesterday to tie the Giants in the NL West. Kenley Jansen has been great all year, but he gave that game away like he was a charity for kids. They’ll get their crack at the Giants for the next four games beginning tonight, but there is plenty to be worried about. With Tony Gonsolin and Josiah Gray starting the next two nights, the bullpen is going to get more work than a stripper when James Harden shows up at the club. I do like the fact that the Dodgers have basically admitted they are resting Clayton Kershaw to try and preserve him for the fall, but it seems highly likely that Trevor Bauer has played his last game for the team. Stan Kasten appears to be doing whatever he can do to get out of his contract, and you can further read the tea leaves when Andrew Friedman said he was prioritizing starting pitching at the upcoming trade deadline. Since the Dodgers need all the offense they can get given their starting pitching situation, they better hope Corey Seager and Mookie Betts can overcome injuries and get themselves in the lineup.

To the NBA where it feels like every Laker not named Lebron James and Anthony Davis is doing everything they can to get traded. Kyle Kuzma is telling the media he can be an all-star in the right role; Montrezell Harrell is complaining on social media about his playing time; Dennis Schroeder just wants somebody to pay him; and Andre Drummond thinks he’s Shaquille O’Neal. Let’s be honest, as crafty as Rob Pelinka is, he needs to try and retain as many of these people as possible and convince them their roles will be better. That way if necessary, he can later trade some of these guys when their value goes up. For those of you expecting a Damian Lillard trade to the Lakers, your chances of winning the Powerball are better. If you’re hoping for this, the best thing for the Lakers would be for Lillard to hold out for another year, or at least until the deadline. That way the Lakers can gather more assets, and have some players with more value than they have now. Still, the Powerball will have better odds.

Meanwhile, the Clippers should be getting at least a little bit nervous about Kawhi. This is a weird dude. He was weird enough to choose the Clippers over the Lakers, and might even be weird enough to leave them. There’s unconfirmed reports out there that Kawhi might take meetings with other free agent teams, and that he is unhappy with the Clippers medical staff. His injury certainly complicates things quite a bit and if he might re-evaluate his future. However, more than anything, Kawhi is just too unpredictable and nobody really know what’s going on with him. That’s the scariest thing for the Clippers come August 2nd.

To the NBA Finals where I haven’t seen Suns fans this shaken since they played a healthy Laker team in early round 1. The Suns are on the brink of elimination after dropping a close game 5 at home to the Bucks. The Suns played well enough to win the last couple of games, but the Bucks trio of Giannis, Jrue Holiday, and Khris Middleton have been ballin. As lame as this series felt going in, it’s turned out to be a phenomenal. It feels like we deserve 7 games. As for that Giannis block in game 4, it was great, but as usual everyone is prisoner of the moment and thinks it’s suddenly better than the Lebron block in 2016 in game 7. The NBA needs to change their slogan to “Where You Become Prisoner Of The Moment”. This photo though is pretty iconic.

Team USA Basketball has had a wobbly warm up to Olympic Play. They managed to defeat Spain yesterday to improve to 2-2 but they should be worried. They don’t have a lot of size, and they don’t have a play making point guard. They also lost Bradley Beal to COVID, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they have to call on more Uber drives to replace him. There is also one major problem: there are more Celtics on the team than Lakers. Seems like a pretty simple problem to me. It’s also a little bit of a struggle for these NBA players who are used to getting phantom calls from referees. These international referees don’t fall for that flopping garbage, and pretending like you got fouled while shoot a 3. The meaningful games start on Saturday, but can’t say I’m terribly optimistic about their chances of winning the gold.

I’m super excited about the Olympics but also very nervous about COVID-19 impacting it. At this point if you test positive for COVID-19, for all intents and purposes your Olympic experience is over. Just ask Bradley Beal, who as I mentioned tested positive, and will no longer be going to Tokyo. The Olympics are always a treat, but this year, it’s truly going to feel a lot more like a battle of attrition.

The UCLA Bruin basketball team is looking really good for next season. Johnny Juzang and Cody Riley made wise decisions to return to school after putting their name in the NBA draft. That means the Bruins will return every single player that helped them get to the Final Four last season, along with a couple of elite recruits that should put the Bruins no worse than in the preseason Top 5. If that doesn’t get people excited and get them to fill up Pauley Pavilion, I don’t know what will! Now if only UCLA could do something about Chip Kelly!

Finally, The Bachelorette is back on ABC tonight, and it was an eventful episode last Monday. It sure feels like all the dudes on the show were far more in love with Connor than Katie based on their reaction to him getting the boot. Heck Michael A kissed him on the cheek goodbye! I was starting to think Connor was going to see more action with Michael than Katie before his time was over. If someone ever played country music outside my window, I would call the police. For reals though guys: who the hell is Brendan and why is he getting a rose at this point? I always thought a roast was filled with jokes, but too bad I didn’t hear any. Katie on a date in a wedding dress is the most ridiculous date this show has ever done. If I ever saw a girl in a wedding dress on a date, I would run for the hills. Perhaps the most cringe-worthy date in the history of the franchise. I’m ready to see where this disaster goes next!

July 12, 2021

The Dodgers got a dramatic win yesterday against the D’Backs to finish off the 1st half of the season strong. However, there is much to be concerned about. The Boys in Blue still can’t seem to overcome the Giants, who still have 2 game lead on them, and the best record in baseball. There is also concern about their pitching staff suddenly getting decimated with injuries to Clayton Kershaw and Dustin May, while Trevor Bauer’s future with the team is in serious doubt . I don’t know about you guys but a one-game playoff against the Padres in October sounds even less appealing than the new Dodger Dogs. The Dodgers might be one of the best teams in the league, but they are vulnerable. The 2nd half of the season is sure to be a stress test for the team, and their fans.

As for the Angels, they hit the All-Star break winners of 7 of their last 10 games, and one game over .500. That at least spares them from complete ridicule here on Monday Morning Coffee. In fact, I’m not going to sit here and complain about the pitching, or criticize selecting a reliever with their 1st round pick yesterday. Instead, I’m going to remind you that Shohei Ohtani might be having the greatest individual season of all-time. Ohtani has become “must-see TV” to the point where in the last week I’ve ran into several people desperately trying to get back to their TV sets to see Ohtani pitch. That’s amazing to think that a talent like that, along with Mike Trout play right here in Anaheim. Now the entire country will get to see Ohtani’s talents on display tonight in the Home Run Derby, and tomorrow in the All-Star Game. The man is clearly on the way to being a much slimmer, Japanese Babe Ruth. Let’s just hope the derby doesn’t screw up his spring like Arte Moreno is capable of screwing up the Halos.

To the NBA Finals where the Bucks got back in the series yesterday by winning game 3 against the Suns. For all the talk that Giannis can’t shoot threes and can’t make free throws, he’s been balling. He’s put up over 40 points in each of his last two games, and his teammates finally showed up. However, I still like the Suns to win this in six games. Chris Paul is on a mission. It wasn’t that long ago we were making fun of CP3’s contract as the worst in the league. Don’t worry though, we’ll soon be making fun of him again when the Suns give him a 3-year $100 million contract as a retirement gift.

Speaking of NBA players, we’re planning on deporting Kevin Durant and the rest of the Team USA squad that lost to Nigeria right? I realize it was only the first exhibition game, but they also lost to a team coached by Mike Brown, who was probably drawing clown faces on the clip board during timeouts. This is a good reminder that the rest of the world has gotten a lot better at basketball, and they have NBA players too. Their NBA players also seem to have more experience playing with each other and better chemistry. For that reason, we can no longer win the Olympic Gold Medal unless we send our very best NBA players. That means the likes of Lebron James, Anthony Davis, Steph Curry, Kawhi Leonard, and James Harden needed to be on the team.

As for the Lakers, I’m getting really tired of hearing Andre Drummond pretend like he’s Wilt Chamberlain. Drummond sucked up so many minutes, and I have no idea why. He’s a nice center, but his offensive game was extremely limited, and frankly, he’s no worth any more than a minimum contract for the Lakers. Sure Gasol and ‘Trezz complained about their roles too, but the Lakers were just fine before Drummond got there. I hope the Lakers just decide to roll out Marc Gasol again, and assure ‘Trezz that he’ll have a bigger role with the team next year. That would be smart from both a basketball perspective, and a salary cap perspective.

How ironic: Connor McGregor said that Dustin Poirier would be leaving the octagon in a stretcher after he faced him. Instead, it was McGregor that left the octagon in a stretcher, and the rest of his career is in serious jeopardy. How can you possibly go on knowing that you’re not going to burn another $100 on a McGregor fight that’s going to last a few seconds? In all seriousness though, here’s to speedy recovery for McGregor regardless of whether or not we see him fight again.

In general, I’ve been a big fan of Shark Week of Discovery for decades. I find sharks the most fascinating, yet also the most terrifying of animals. However, seeing Jackass as part of tradition, let alone having them eat chum and throw up on camera, was awful. The premier started off nicely with Steve Irwin’s kid diving with sharks, and comparing them to crocodiles. I also was really looking forward to seeing Great Whites on Shark Week since I didn’t get to see any sharks when I went cage diving two weeks ago in Cape Town, South Africa. Anyway, let’s hope the rest of the week is some real educational content, and not some celebrity cameo gimmicks, or fake stories that try to convince us that Megalodon still exists.

Finally, the Bachelorette went down last week and it’s back tonight on ABC.
My favorite part of the Bachelorette every week is when Union leader Aaron tells me who I’m supposed to hate next. Nice to see that Katie thought this week was fun and easy, meanwhile, Michael almost died playing some sport she just invented. I can’t believe after all Michael went through, Hunter got a rose instead. I think Hunter actually interrupted a toast too, which makes him an extra slime bag. Thanks to ABC for spoiling that Blake gets a hometown date. Leave that to the internet guys. Greg Grippo is definitely the kind of dude that loves shopping at Target. Greg crying during Michael’s story is something everybody is talking about but come on people…..he’s an actor! I don’t buy it! It’s about to get really interesting tonight with 5 dudes getting sent packing. Looking forward to it!

July 5, 2021

There is much to get to in the 4th of July weekend edition of MMC starting with the Clippers. The Clips made it further than they have in the history of their franchise before getting eliminated by the Suns. They did so without their best player, so it has to be considered a successful season. They also gained a lost of respect with their resiliency compared to last season’s debacle. However, the sustainability of their success is solely dependent on Kawhi Leonard’s health, and if he re-signs with the team. This dude was actually weird enough to choose the Clippers instead of playing with Lebron and AD two years ago. You have to ask yourself the question if he’s weird enough to leave the Clippers when they are definitively championship contenders with him. Probably not, but nobody really knows this dude. If he starts taking meetings with Miami, New York, or Dallas, you should be worried. We’ll find out in a month from now. Pat Beverley is a punk for that shove he made on CP3, and then his weak apology when it was over. Beverley is clearly is a dude who washes his clothes in the sink. We did also find out how weird Steve Ballmer is. Imagine how crazy this guy would get if the Clippers ever won an NBA Championship.

Meanwhile, the Lakers and their fans will not let this idea of a Damian Lillard trade go. It only got worse when Dame showed up to a Sparks game and greeted Lebron warmly. Lillard is a superstar under contract for the next four seasons, and he hasn’t asked for a trade. Even if he did , the Lakers have a couple of dirty socks, Kyle Kuzma’s hair gel, and an empty can of Coke to offer. That won’t get a trade done when the Celtics, Warriors, and 76ers have much more to offer. Even the idea of trading for a player like Ben Simmons is preposterous for the Lake Show. The most important move the Lakers can make this summer is re-signing Dennis Schroeder. He’s currently their third best player and if nothing else, can be an asset used in a trade later if he doesn’t work out. Ultimately, if Lebron and AD are healthy though, everyone else is replaceable.

Well here we are at the NBA Finals I’m sure we all predicted: The Milwaukee Bucks vs the Phoenix Suns. I’m sure all the executives at ESPN and ABC are about to jump out of their windows knowing that this isn’t going to do much for the ratings. As for the matchup, I realize that every NBA champion is influenced by injuries that occur in a season. However, I have never seen a team like the Phoenix Suns get the kind of breaks they are getting. The Lakers, Nuggets, and Clippers have all had their best or 2nd best players hobbled by injuries during their series with the Suns, and Phoenix has taken full advantage. I can’t criticize them because the Jazz did not do so. Now they get a Bucks team that is going to have a hobbled Giannis. That’s another perfect opportunity for them to steal one more series, and an NBA title. I’ve got the Suns in 7.

Scottie Pippen is unbelievable. This feels like a preview of what Kevin Durant is going to be like in twenty years from now. In case you missed it, Pippen went on the Dan Patrick show and claimed that Phil Jackson is a racist for drawing up a game-winning play for Tony Kukoc at the end of a playoff game in 1994. Phil Jackson might have some racially insensitive tendencies, but it’s hard for me to imagine that this man, who was a head coach for over 20 years in the NBA, is a racist. Especially since I haven’t heard one other single player who has played for him say this about him. Scottie sounds angry and upset about the way he’s been portrayed since “The Last Dance” aired last year.

In baseball, the Dodgers are winning games but they have a mess on their hands with the Trevor Bauer situation. In case you’ve been living under a rock the past week, Bauer is being accused of sexual assault by a San Diego woman, and is now on administrative leave for the next week while the investigation takes place. I can’t sugar coat this: the allegations are bad if they are true. The media is also giving it to Stan Kasten and the entire Dodger organization right now in a “I told you so” moment, questioning if Bauer should have ever been signed. Kasten must think he works at USC, where this kind of stuff is swept under the rug all the time. That’s not the case here, as the media hammered him about it all weekend, and was not in the mood for his jokes. It is entirely possible that Bauer has pitched his last game as a Dodger if the findings of this investigation go badly. Even if they don’t and Bauer gets by on this one, doing damage control will be tough, and will continue to be tough for the entire organization. It’s going to get especially awkward a week from now when Bauer’s administrative leave is up and there is no conclusion to the investigation yet. Stay tuned for more drama on this one.

Speaking of the Dodgers, Mark Walter and Todd Boehly purchased a minority share of the Lakers – 27% – from Philip Anschutz. There is some real significance to this from a media perspective. Just when you think the cable model is about to crumble, the Dodgers and Lakers might join forces to form some media bundle for you to watch them both. Both of them currently have their own channel’s that are difficult to find outside of a cable subscription. The Dodger channel, Spectrum Sportsnet LA is still difficult to attain, even after it was picked up by DirecTV. At the same time, you may have noticed that the cost of streaming services is rising about as fast as your federal tax bill. You can expect the cost of either to go up in the near future with this move, because there will surely be an offering on both. What will you do now millennials? Double down on those illegal streams? Your move.

The Angels had a nice weekend of baseball against the Orioles, but they are still miles out of playoff contention. It’s actually quite frustrating. Joe Maddon says “We’re really close to being really good.” I’m assuming what he means by this is that they just need Mike Trout to return, then acquire three really good starting pitchers and three really good relievers. What’s especially frustrating is that Shohei Ohtani has emerged as a spectacular talent, and Jared Walsh is turning into a stud as well. So much talent, yet so little pitching. It’s remarkable really. It’s gotten so bad that the presumed “ace” at the beginning of the year, Dylan Bundy, is being demoted to the bullpen. They should have sold high on Bundy last year when he was pitching like a true number 1 starter. I’d say the Halos can be sellers at the deadline, but they really don’t have much to sell that’ going to be appealing to other teams. At best, right now this is a team that might be able to sell a few tickets with Trout and Ohtani, but no chance of winning anything at any point in the near future.

Now that the NCAA has been forced to allow their athletes to make money off their name, image, and likeness, Reggie Bush is speaking out. Bush said this week that he wants his Heisman Trophy back, and that he rightfully earned it. The bottom line is that nobody in their right mind, not even a UCLA homer, would tell you that Bush didn’t earn that Heisman Trophy. Simply because he accepted some cash or a car doesn’t change what he did on the field. He was special, and so was that entire USC team, which will always be remembered as one of the great teams in College Football History. No NCAA archaic rules will ever change that in the court of public opinion. With that being said, he absolutely deserves his trophy back, to have his jersey retired, and to be honored for what he accomplished. Still, it’s hard for me to imagine the NCAA re-instating him. The NCAA is trying to hold on to what little legitimacy and power they have left as an organization, and re-instating all the athletes like Bush who are in a similar situation, undermines that effort.

I’m ecstatic about the Summer Olympics that are coming up in 17 days, but was super disappointed that Sha’Carri Richardson is getting suspended for using pot. Richardson was the favorite to win the women’s 100 meter dash. We can sit here and tell you how archaic the World Anti-Doping Agency rules are, and how pot is not even a performance enhancing drug. We should also all feel terrible for Richardson that she lost her mom recently, causing her to resort to pot. With all that being said though, she’s been working for 4 years for this. She knows what she can and cannot put in her body. She knows she is going to be tested regularly. This is completely on her. At least we will be fortunate enough to see her run the 4 x 100 meter relay.

Finally, the Bachelorette went down last week on ABC and it’s back again tonight. The most obnoxious part of last week’s episode is that even though Thomas got the guillotine from Katie, what guy on the show hasn’t thought about being “The Bachelor”? Then again, what guy who hasn’t been on the show hasn’t thought about being “The Bachelor”? Justin really can’t ever be sent home because his facial expressions are just too good. I’m still trying to figure out how Katie’s skin tone on her hands and face are a completely different color. Perhaps an issue at the tanning bed. Bachelor Nation is completely up in arms over Blake’s arrival after all that quality time they put in with Greg the last couple of weeks. This is Blake’s third bachelorette he’s pursuing. This is a Kardashian level type of achievement. If he gets rejected again on National TV again, hopefully that PPP loan everyone is getting from The Bachelor will be used to pay for his therapy. Looking forward to seeing what goes down next.

June 28, 2021

This time the Clippers look like they are in trouble.  After an ugly game 4, the Clippers are down 3-1 in their best-of-seven series against the Suns.  That game was so ugly, if we were going by Lawler’s Law, the game might still be going on.  It’s also apparent that the crime rate in LA goes way up during Clipper playoff games because PG-13 is stealing Steve Ballmer’s money.  Ok fine….PG has had some good playoff games this season, but he’s also had numerous chances to help the Clippers take hold of this series.  Saturday night was also the 11th playoff game of his career where he shot 25% or worse.  Only Bob Cousy and Tommy Heinson have more.  I also can’t understand why Patrick Beverly and Luke Kennard can’t combine for more than a couple of baskets when making almost $30 mill combined this year.  With all that being said though, it’s still an admirable run for the Clippers, who have had their share of injuries to deal with. Steve Ballmer isn’t exactly thrilled with Playoff P though.

Meanwhile the off-season is starting off rough for the Lakers.  Alex Caruso got caught with some pot at an airport, and KCP got robbed at gun point.  Hopefully this isn’t a sign of things to come for the remainder of the summer.  You also shouldn’t be surprised if the Lakers make a call to the 76ers about Ben Simmons.  It makes too much sense since he’s a Klutch Client.  I doubt the Lakers have the pieces to make it happen, but I think the Sixers are going to be very disappointed when they learn that Simmons trade value is about the same as a Happy Meal from McDonald’s at this point.

This Dodgers took 3 of 4 from the Cubs over the weekend, but the season is becoming frustrating to watch.  The Giants and even the Padres don’t seem to be letting up.  However, here’s some perspective: the Dodgers are 47-31.  That still gives them the 2nd best record in the NL, and 3rd best record in baseball with 84 games left.  They’ve also done that with only 7 home runs combined from Cody Bellinger and Corey Seager.  The last week has been especially annoying after getting swept by the Padres, with the Giants continuing to pile up wins.  Still, there’s time, and lots of head-to-head games against both the Giants and Padres. They are only 3.5 games back of the Giants, and their hated rivals are coming to town next.  There’s also no glaring trade deadline need.  They just need to play better and they have the pieces to do that.   I’m usually the one bitching about the Dodgers, but I’m in rare form being positive.  I’m even optimistic that Andrew Friedman’s computer will get a nice software refresh for the 2nd half of the season, so you won’t have to keep bitching about Dave Robert’s decision making.

As for the Angels, so much for thinking they were turning things around. Despite salvaging a win yesterday,  they got thrashed by the Giants and Rays last week, reminding us that they just can’t hang with good teams with or without Mike Trout.  Speaking of those Giants, It’s pretty incredible that a team like that and the Red Sox can go from trash to elite in 1 year, yet the Angels stay consistently trash every single season.  It would be also be nice if Angels media actually asked questions and tried to get answers on questionable moves by the team. I’d like to learn actual insight about some decision making in the organization, not what song Joe Maddon listened to on the ride to the stadium.  This type of media coddling would never happen in the Laker or Dodger locker rooms.

Finally, The Bachelorette is back on ABC tonight. Last week’s episode had it all: gossip, drama, betrayal, unionization, group therapy, and discussions about consent. The faces that Justin makes are priceless. It’s like he’s experiencing his own personal episode of “The Office”. This episode was also a reminder that Pluto isn’t considered a planet anymore, which is upsetting considering most of us were told it was in school. I could tell Karl was going to be annoying just by his face and the fact his name is Karl. I think Thomas is a good guy, but dudes in the house are just salty. At this point I think Greg is either going to win, or be the next Bachelor. Nick Viall showing up was actually pretty funny. If I were the bachelor or the bachelorette, the first people I would eliminate are anybody with duplicate names. I’m not going to sit there for 13 episodes calling somebody “Mark C”. I never really thought Nick Viall’s run on the The Bachelor franchise would would outlast Chris Harrison’s. Also, since when is Nick a licensed therapist? Also, Katie what’s with the suit jacket you showed up with at dinner? Looking forward to next week’s episode.

June 21, 2021

It took 43 years, but the Clippers are finally here: The Western Conference Finals. It doesn’t matter that they lost game 1 to the Suns. Let’s be honest, the Clips have been the punching bag of Jock Talk LA for almost a decade, and the red-headed step child of LA Sports Franchises for four decades. However, no matter what happens against the Suns, they deserve every bit of credit for what they’ve accomplished. It’s safe to say they “Mann-ed” up! Sorry that was too easy. However, the team could have packed it in and booked their flights to Cancun after Kawhi got hurt. Instead, Paul George actually played like the elite player he’s capable of being, while Terance Mann and Reggie Jackson turned into Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen. Also, for those of you that think Ty Lue is just some ex-player that ran to Dick’s Sporting Goods to buy a clipboard and a whistle when Lebron and Kawhi picked him to be their coach, think again. Lue has out-coached both Rick Carlisle and Quin Snyder with his small ball lineups, and made brilliant adjustments after trailing 0-2 in both series. Without Kawhi, they are playing with house money against the Suns. Nobody expects them to win, but don’t be surprised if they do. They hung in yesterday, but Devin Booker was just too much. Still, they are starting to believe in themselves, and frankly, it would almost be weird if they didn’t start this series down 0-2!

Ty Lue made a very “matter of fact” comment regarding the Lakers after the Clippers advanced to the Conference Finals. Lue said “I always look at it differently. I know the Lakers are out and there’s a lot of Laker fans here. But once the Lakers are gone, if we’re not playing the Lakers, you should be cheering for the Clippers because it’s all in one city.” This is not an unreasonable take at all. The problem is, the most die hard NBA fans, including Laker, fans aren’t always reasonable people. NBA fans often cheer for outcomes dictated by their experience with opposing fans they know. So there’s plenty of Laker fans out there that get peeved when their Clipper fan neighbor says “I think this is the Clippers year”. They take it personally, and just want the Clippers to lose. Not because they hate the Clippers, but because they just want to stick it to their neighbor. The is a very common and bizarre NBA fan occurrence. In reality though, it’s inspirational stories like the Clippers overcoming adversity that actually make people want to watch sports.

Elsewhere around the NBA Playoffs, Lebron is going to have a lot of fun with KD, Kyrie, and Harden when he sees them this week in Cancun. The Nets super team was super injured, but props to the Bucks for taking advantage of it and coming up big on the road in game 7. Giannis approaches every free throw stressing like his life is on the line, but nevertheless, he still made some big plays to get the Bucks to the Conference Finals. Ben Simmons disappeared like Emilia Earhar, and Joel Embiid had more turnovers than Betty Crocker, and the Sixers were sent packing, while the Hawks are headed to the East Finals. Also, Dick Vitale needs one of his grand kids to teach him how to use acronyms on Social Media. Either that or he’s been spending too much time on Porn Hub.

To baseball, where we are just a few weeks away from the All-Star break and the Dodgers are playing well. The problem is they are still chasing the Giants for 1st place in the NL West. Other than the “new Dodger Dogs”, this team has no glaring weakness that needs to be addressed at the trade deadline. Sure they could use a bullpen arm here or there, but who couldn’t? They just need to get healthy, and need the Giants to come back to earth, and something tells me they are playing way over their heads and overachieving. All of the solutions to the Dodgers problem are internal. Better approaches at the plate, better situational hitting, and a clean bill of health are what this team needs to repeat. Remember when we thought Kenley Jansen was done? Funny, I don’t hear anybody screaming from the mountain top anymore that he needs to be sent packing. He’s looked like the Kenley of old. They’ve got some big games coming up against the Padres, Cubs, and Giants, so hopefully they take these games just as serious as if it were a pivotal game in September. They count just as much in the standings.

As for the Angels, just when you think they are playing a little bit better and might do something, reality hits that they aren’t going anywhere in the standings. Heading into Sunday, the Halos had won 7 of their last 10, but were still 7.5 games back of 1st place Oakland in the AL West. They are also 6 games back of the Wild Card, and they’d need to climb over 4 teams to get there. I get it’s only June, but this is one of the softest parts of the schedule, the Halos are now .500, but can’t even make up any ground in the standings. The most exciting thing this team has to celebrate is Shohei Ohtani participating in the Home Run Derby. Then again they might not be celebrating come September when he goes in a massive slump like many Derby participants usually do. I also love how Taylor Ward has become a useful player, and suddenly people think the Angels know how to scout. You can’t scout if you don’t have scouts. They would uncover a lot more useful players if Arte Moreno spent some money on player development.

So let me get this straight……Sofi Stadium is now the host of another College Football Glorified consolation game, as I like to call them? It will feature the fifth place finisher in the Pac-12, against the first place finisher in the Mountain West. In this instance, Jimmy Kimmel is putting his name on the game, in what will be a called “The Jimmy Kimmel Bowl”. Well as long as UCLA keeps Chip Kelly as their head coach, they might as well call it “The Jimmy Kimmel UCLA Bowl”.

Finally, the Bachelorette is back on ABC tonight for episode 3 of this season, and last week was filled with drama. On one hand, it was probably very premature to send Cody packing, but on the other hand, Katie saved us from having to deal with two weeks of nonsense drama. Plus, now Cody can go focus on being famous in the zipper sales industry. Katie is really going to miss out on free zippers for life though. I admire Karl and his resilient approach to creating drama, and even giving Katie a tutorial on how to be The Bachelorette. That guy actually gets paid to speak for a living? I would pay just to have him not speak. I love how John was just grinning while getting absolutely demolished in the mud pit. Katie feels like she might pull a Clare and just go home with Greg right now. What exactly are “the right reasons” to be a contestant on The Bachelorette? I wonder if Chris Harrison is actually watching this season. The man is still missed by everyone on every episode. Katie hasn’t done anything wildly unpopular yet, so looking forward to seeing what’s in store next.

June 14, 2021

I’d like to welcome Paul George to the 2021 NBA Playoffs. Nice of him to grace his team with a decent performance before they got sent packing to Cancun. George showed up in a big way on Saturday night Staples Center, helping the Clippers get back into their 2nd round series against the Jazz. To be fair though, the “Pandemic P” label has been warranted. Prior to game 4, George shot 35% in his previous 4 playoff games, and just 31% from 3. He’s also had 10 career playoff games in which he’s shot 25% or worse on 15 or more attempts. Over the last 60 postseasons, no other player has recorded more than 7 such games. That makes Pandemic P more dangerous than COVID-19. If the Clippers can get the PG they got on Saturday night, they are a legitimate threat to make it to the NBA Finals, not just get out of this round. The Clippers know what they are getting from Kawhi, but other than that, it’s a crap shoot from night-to-night. They don’t have much margin for error left though, against the best team in the regular season, so they better hope PG shows up again tonight.

As for the Lakers, they are still making headlines after getting eliminated in the 1st round by the Suns. I will never understand the obsession with Jason Kidd as a head coach. Kidd is still on the Lakers staff as a top assistant, and mostly because Lebron wants him there. He is also wanted in Portland by Damian Lillard. They Blazers don’t want him though, and prefer Chauncey Billups, which is why Kidd withdrew his name from the process. He’s probably going to withdraw his name from the Nuggets job too after watching them play this weekend. In all seriousness though, there is no other team in the league that will hire him as a head coach, yet somehow his name stays out there because a few players like him. He didn’t have much success as a head coach in either of the two stints he had with the Nets and Bucks. It’s a phenomenon I will never understand. I will also never understand Montrezl Harrell’s instagram. He wrote a classy and lengthy post that thanked the Lakers and their fans, but it’s hard to know if this is goodbye or not.

It was a rough weekend for the Dodgers. Despite taking 2 of 3 from the Rangers and inching closer to 1st place, the injuries are piling up again. Max Muncy has been an MVP candidate, but he is now on the injured list with an oblique strain. Cody Bellinger missed the last two games with an injured hamstring as well. Thank god for the garbage time home runs though from Albert Pujols. There’s nobody I’d rather have at the plate in the 7th inning and beyond with the game completely decided, and nobody on base. The guy turns into Babe Ruth at that point, and seems like all his Dodger home runs have come then. The Giants aren’t going away though and neither are the Padres. On a different note however, Clayton Kershaw was brilliant on Friday. He really doesn’t get enough credit for still being great, because he was so brilliant at his peak. That’s how good he is.

Meanwhile, the Angels are suddenly 19-14 since releasing Albert Pujols, and over .500 for the season. As I said last week, this is the time for them to bank wins because their schedule is softer than tissue paper. This past week has also seen the lowest spin rates of any week this season in the MLB, resulting in strikeouts being down, and batting averages being up. It’s been so wild, even the Angels are hitting with Mike Trout out of the lineup! I don’t know if the Angels can keep this up with Oakland, San Francisco, the Rays, and Yankees coming up next. However, with Mike Trout coming back and the pitching looking a little better for now, there’s always some hope.

Finally, the season Premiere of The Bachelorette went down last night on ABC. I like how all 28 guys thought there was no way a dude in a cat costume, Conner, and a dude hiding in a box, James, were going to impress Katie. By the end of the night, they were ready to go buy their own costumes, and wish they could put James back in the box. Then there was the necklace that was made of pasta. “It’s not real gold, it’s just pasta” has to be the line of the season that can’t be topped. Greg seems to be the fan favorite early on though, at least in the court of public opinion. Of the seven dudes that got eliminated, I’m thankful we don’t get to learn about Jeff’s background as a “Skin Salesman.” Bad move with the RV. You’ve gotta love that moment when Tayshia said she “loves a guy in a truck”. Imagine what Zach was thinking, watching the premiere at home. It was a great first episode, but I’m not going to lie, it’s just not the same without Chris Harrison. The girls did a great job as co-hosts, but Harrison was symbolic of the entire franchise. Looking forward to seeing what this drama beings next week.

June 7th, 2021

Don’t over think it people. The Lakers best players weren’t healthy enough for them to defend their title. It’s as simple as that. Anthony Davis had been falling apart all season long, and Lebron James couldn’t dominate like he usually does because of his ankle. It’s not about father time catching up with Lebron. It’s also not even about Anthony Davis being too injury prone. It’s about having the shortest off-season in NBA history, and not enough time to recover. Sure the Lakers could use more shooting. Sure they could use another shot creator. Sure Anthony Davis could work on his body. However, don’t lose sight of what this was about: lack of health and lack of time to recover. In the meantime, between now and the start of the season, Laker fans can fantasize about trading a couple of bags of chips, some expired cans of soda, and hand sanitizer for Damian Lillard or Bradley Beal. I’m sure there will be changes, but don’t expect anything of that magnitude this off-season. That’s perfectly fine because this team should still contend.

The Clippers were not going to let it happen. No way were the Clippers going to let themselves lose game 7, and then be subjected to all-time levels of slander on Monday Morning Coffee. The Mavericks gave the Clippers a hell of a series. However at some point the home team was due to win, and it makes perfect sense that it was going to happen in game 7, when 80% of home teams win. Props to Kawhi and even Paul George for stepping up when they needed to. Also props to Tim Hardaway Jr, who’s beard and jump shot were both immaculate in this series. If Luka Doncic just gets a little bit more help, the Mavs can win an NBA Championship. It would help if Kristaps Porzingas weren’t a more expensive 7’3 Kyle Kuzma. As for the Clippers though, they survived, but they are going to have to come up even bigger against a tough Utah Jazz team if they plan on making it to their first conference final in franchise history.

The Dodgers had a tough time with the Atlanta Braves over the weekend. The Boys in Blue might be one of the better teams in the NL right now, but they have two big problems that won’t go away: the Giants and the Padres. I realize there is still a lot of baseball left to be played, but given the Dodger injuries and their inconsistencies at the plate, there is a very realistic scenario where the Dodgers are in a one-game playoff on the road against the Giants or Padres. If I earned a dollar for every time Albert Pujols hit a meaningless home run after the 7th inning, I feel like I would be as rich as Pujols right now. This is exactly why the Dodgers offense is so deceiving. They lead the league in runs per game, but their situation hitting is keeping them out of 1st place in the NL. Up next is a 3-game set at the Pirates, where they’ll try to get back in the win column.

The Angels had a so-so series against the Mariners over the weekend, splitting a four-game set. It’s now or never for this team. They began last week with a stretch of 17 games against teams that are a combined 17 games under .500. The Angels began yesterday 7 games back of 1st place in the AL West. There’s some signs of life with their pitching and bullpen. However, now Anthony Rendon looks like the new Albert Pujols. He’s got as bad of a contract as Albert did, and now he’s hitting exactly like Albert. With Rendon slumping and Mike Trout out of the lineup, even against in a stretch of weaker opponents there is no margin for error. If the Angels don’t make up ground before the end of the month, they might as well start booking their ski trips for the winter.

Who really paid $50 for that Floyd Mayweather v Logan Paul fight last night? I streamed it illegally and I still want my money back. Who knew that there was a difference between Logan Paul and Jake Paul? We saw what happened the last time Floyd fought a non-boxer in Conor McGregor, yet many of you took the bait anyway. Paul was ready to go back to making YouTube videos after the 1st round. Of course that fight ended in “a draw”. Floyd could have ended it anytime. I’ve seen him exert more effort walking around his club on a Sunday night. Somebody please bring heavyweight boxing back to life because we desperately need it instead of these gimmicks!

Finally, are you ready to watch a live train wreck on TV? That’s right folks. A new season of The Bachelorette premieres tonight on ABC. The Bachelorette will be Katie Thurston, who was a big fan favorite that got eliminated early in the last season of The Bachelor. That season ended up being a lost cause for The Bachelor himself. I’m sure like every season, we’ll go into it with high hopes, end up criticizing The Bachelorette once we find out she’s far more flawed than we anticipated. Then we’ll be completely unsatisfied with the ending. We’ll then vow that we’ll never watch it again. Of course we’ll be back to watch the next season after that. Rinse and repeat right? Not sure how we just keep getting sucked in.